Interview With Andrew Hamra CEO of Runnur

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How Did You Get Started?

I got started about 4 years ago. I had a bad back and the doctor told me that I should not carry all of my every day items on my back. So I tried carrying some of the smaller items in my front pockets like my keys, my wallet, my phone and stuff.

But it made me feel clunky. I figured their had to be a better way to carry around all this stuff. I wasn’t going to rock a fanny pack and I had a messenger bag but noticed that a lot of the space went unused; especially if I wasn’t carrying my laptop.  So I created something I could carry around all the time and I called it the Runnur.

 

Did You Make Blueprints?

The concept came pretty quickly. The layout and where things would best be placed was all pretty much decided during my first sketch of the Runnur. I think the sketch overall took me about 10 minutes.

However, there were a few modifications to the design once the product was made and shown to people like the carabineer or the pocket for the passport.

 

How Long Did It Take For This Idea To Become A Tangible Product?

The sketch sat in my closet for about a year or so before I actually did anything with it. When I finally found the time, I showed it to a friend of mine who was a business guy and we developed the prototype. Lucky for me, my friend just so happened to share an office with a guy who helps develop new ideas. So we went through the whole process of getting it manufactured in China and what not.

 

Did You Study Business Or Marketing In College?

I went to college in New Orleans.  Tulane University, Go Pelicans! I studied Political Economy which is more of a macro view of business.

What I learned most from undergrad is how to have a good time. Which is really important. When you go to music shows, trade shows and conventions you have to have a good time. If you’re not having a good time their not having a good time. This kind of mantra is definitely beginning to become apart of my companies culture.

 

Do You Manage Runnur Fulltime?

Yup, I work on Runnur full time.

 

What Was The Most Useful Thing You Learned That Helped You Start This Company?

I opened up a sandal store on the beach in Austin, after I graduated college. In fact, I was the first person to sell sandals online even before Zappos. I would go to trade shows a lot because I had to purchase for the store. And I learned a lot while I ran that business. I saw the highs and the lows.

And I eventually closed the doors on the store after about 5 years. And I learned a lot of invaluable lessons. I made a lot of mistakes but I definitely figured out what not to do.

 

What Was The Reaction From Your Peers, Family And Customers, When You First Created The Runnur?

The general reaction from almost everyone was like “Oh wow, that’s pretty cool. That would be great for Festivals or traveling or hiking.” So, I would say the overall response was really positive. I could tell that people liked the design a lot for its functionality.

 

When Did You Know You Had Something?

Well, I went to college with the guys who created Bonnaroo. Them and I are old buddies. So, I contacted them and told’em about how people were saying Runnur would be great for festivals. He liked the idea but we weren’t able to get a Bonnaroo branded Runnur in time. So instead,  he gave us a discounted booth and we spent the weekend at Bonnaroo. We sold about 100; which allowed me and the friends who came with me to break even. We covered the cost of the booth, gas, and our hotel stay. I think seeing the reaction of people at Bonnarro really solidify the idea that I had something people really liked.

 

If You Could Give An Up & Coming Entrepreneur Advice What Would You Tell Him Or Her?

I have heard a lot of people say to me “Oh I had that same idea.” So, what I would tell a young entrepreneur is don’t just have an idea.

You have to follow-through. The idea is easy. The story really gets long when you have to get things prototype, brand your company, create a name, understand your demographics, product distribution, marketing plan and so on. Having a concept is simple. But growing the idea and company takes real work and determination.

 

Also, don’t be discouraged. I’m 37; this probably wouldn’t be happening if I were freshman in college. I had to experience my first business failure to really be where I am today.

 

111a Interview With Andrew Hamra CEO of Runnur111b Interview With Andrew Hamra CEO of Runnur

 

Maximillian Garland| Bright Futura Columnist

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schools kill creativity

Sir Ken Robinson makes an entertaining and profoundly moving case for creating an education system that nurtures (rather than undermines) creativity.

TEDTalks is a daily video podcast of the best talks and performances from the TED Conference, where the world’s leading thinkers and doers are invited to give the talk of their lives in 18 minutes — including speakers such as Jill Bolte Taylor, Sir Ken Robinson, Hans Rosling, Al Gore and Arthur Benjamin. TED stands for Technology, Entertainment, and Design, and TEDTalks cover these topics as well as science, business, politics and the arts.

 

It’s easy to see why this clever and inspiring talk is one of the most watched lecture on the internet.

 

Want more of this guy? –> Amazing Speech By Sir Ken Robinson: The Learning Revolution <—

 

Sir Ken Robinson (the smart British guy from above thinks Schools Kill Creativity) What are your thoughts

 

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amazing

 

Why you should listen to him:

Why don’t we get the best out of people? Sir Ken Robinson argues that it’s because we’ve been educated to become good workers, rather than creative thinkers. Students with restless minds and bodies — far from being cultivated for their energy and curiosity — are ignored or even stigmatized, with terrible consequences. We are educating people out of their creativity,” Robinson says. It’s a message with deep resonance. Robinson’s TEDTalk has been distributed widely around the Web since its release in June 2006. The most popular words framing blog posts on his talk? “Everyone should watch this.”

 

A visionary cultural leader, Sir Ken led the British government’s 1998 advisory committee on creative and cultural education, a massive inquiry into the significance of creativity in the educational system and the economy, and was knighted in 2003 for his achievements. His latest book, The Element: How Finding Your Passion Changes Everything, a deep look at human creativity and education, was published in January 2009.

 

“Ken’s vision and expertise is sought by public and commercial organizations throughout the world.”

BBC Radio 4

 

Want more of this guy? —> Smart British Guy Thinks Schools Kill Creativity   <—

 

This Amazing Speech by Sir Ken Robinson was brought to you by Tedtalks. Find more amazing tedtalks videos on their website. We promise you won’t be bored.

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Internships After Graduation?

internships

college students unpaid internship jobs graduation ecards someecards 300x167 Internships After Graduation?Graduation is a very major milestone in everyone’s lifetime.   After years of continuous studies, quizzes, assignments, and tests, you are finally free to take your first steps in your professional life. However, that is a major test in itself nowadays. With the economic downturn, finding a good job is nearly impossible because of the number of applicants jumping at every good opportunity. What you can do to improve your odds however is apply for part time jobs or  through the various recruitment services available online such as: http://www.inspiringinterns.com/

Who says internships are only meant for students?

Students and fresh graduates both can apply for internships and use them to gain access to the organizations where they want to get full time jobs.

They are an excellent method to test careers and employers and to enhance your network. They might even give you access to better positions, as opposed to entry-level jobs.

Good full time jobs are very difficult to come by if you don’t have some experience written on your resume. However, with internships or temporary placements such as a part time job, you might just find the kind of job you were looking for. Once you have access into an organization, you can easily network

careerjobs jobs internship listings1 Internships After Graduation?

Network. Network. Network.

All you need are good interpersonal skills and a professional attitude. Internships are specially useful to get the feel for an organization and gain entry there. Once you’re in, you’re in. Most organizations put together a resource pool of interns that they can hire later on as full time employees. That, combined with a strong network within the company is all you need to find yourself a decent full-time position.

According to surveys by several educational and human capital development institutes, employers usually hire most of their interns for full time positions. Internships are low risk scenarios where the intern gets to know the organization and how it works, while they get to see the candidate in action. This gives them a much better understanding of how they will perform in a proper job. This makes internships excellent tools for both entities to see how well they fit together.

Whether you go for an unpaid or paid internship, both are pretty good investments of your time as long as you have done your homework about the organization. Just make sure you use that time to make a permanent place in the organization for yourself.

Once you’re through the internship term, you won’t necessarily get a full time position there right then. However, you will still gain some experience and learn some new skills. You will also be able to add a few stars to your resume and hence, will improve your chances of getting a good job at other firms. Moreover, if you have networked properly during the internship, you should have a decent network of contacts that you can utilize for career advice and referrals.

images Internships After Graduation?

Regardless of all this, you have to tell the company what you want. Until they know that you are interested in a full time position there, they won’t be sure about it. Why wait for them to decide to hire you? Once you’re through half of your internship term, communicate your interest to your boss and ask them what the proper steps would be to apply for a certain department. If done properly, this should give you the entry-point you wanted.

rich people

richpeople 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

If you are reading this than you probably aren’t rich. I mean hell, you’re probably in college which is almost the opposite of being rich. No offense! Furthermore you have probably realized that the cost of the “good life” is far from your reach. This is a sad pitiful truth my friend. However,

if you embrace this reality early enough, you can begin to focus on what is really important… money!

I mean that is why you went to college right…to make more money. Duh!

Because as you know, only those with money can live a life of comfort, luxury and happiness. sigh. Rich people have it all.

 

Below I have Listed 50 Things Rich People Have That You Don’t (try not to whine)

 

1.  Access to the latest technology

Screen Shot 2012 06 05 at 8.38.18 AM 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

 

2.  Access to excellent trauma and health care

italian healthcare 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

 

3. Access to information at their finger tips

Hand on computer mouse via Flickr by Rodriago compressed 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

 

4.  Access Music at their finger tips

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5. Access to movies and entertainment at their finger tips

kls 630x328px kid using ipad flickr aperturismo 630w 1 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

 

6. Cable and Satellite tv

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courtesy of AndrewH2010

7. Air conditioning

Window Air Conditioner 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

PHOTO BY FLICKR.COM/12738795@N00

8. Access to clean drinking water

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Photo By joshme17 (flickr)

9.  Access to clean water to bathe

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By Greenman 2008

10. Access to clean water to wash their clothes

laundromat k12istina15 flickr 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

image credit: k12istina15/flickr.

11. Access to clothes without holes

mishka 2010 spring lookbook 06 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

12. Shoes on their feet

3421818530 e0d4accd1f b 640x425 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

13. Access to electricity

light up night pittsburgh flickr bethykae 1 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

Light Up Night Nov. 28, 2008 pic by bethykae on flickr

14. Access to libraries

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NYC Public Library By LizBallerPhotos

15. Access to great education

classroom with old green desks 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

16. Access to 3 meals a day

snack 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

courtesy of teamsugar.com

17. A warm and safe bed to sleep in

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courtesy of Libertad Leal

18. Freedom to fight for your country

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Photo by U.S. Army Alaska

19. Freedom to learn to play any instrument

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courtesy of KaniR Photography

20. Freedom to drive

tel aviv traffic flickr david55king 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

photo by Lester Brown

21. Freedom to vote

vote flickr 2999130055 original 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

22. Freedom to love who they wish

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23. The ability to live until their bodies fail

look at this happy face 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

24. Freedom to tumbl for hours

tumblr lkfskdqTwz1qdd2z8o1 500 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

25. Freedom to send meaningless tweets

Will Tweeting 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

26. Freedom to facebook stalk

facebookstalking001 chris 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

27. Freedom to use the phone

681140 f520 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

28. Freedom to sing

 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

courtesy of Herschell Hershey

29.  The freedom to dance

14060171 3150e7729b 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

bay to break-dance-ers. by dipity.com

30. Freedom to run

Parkour 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

31. Freedom to start a business

lemonade stand x 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

32. Freedom to run for office

election l2350345 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

33. Freedom to play

adults playing twister pic getty images 585390329 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

34. Freedom to smile

laughter 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

35. Freedom of speech

yell shout chant occupy wall street protest 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

36. Freedom of religion

5361524 muslim male is praying outdoor on green ground 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

37. Freedom of press

Freedom Press Main pic 1 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

38. Freedom to protest

occupy wall st 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

39. Freedom to attend live music

tumblr lxukwiSrFu1r5y7tco1 500 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

40. Freedom to learn

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41. The freedom to root for the home team

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courtesy via Sara Duane-Gladden

42. The ability to move any where they wish

Moving stacy and Brian. Flickr Photo Sharing 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

43. The ability to create and be creative

How to Be Creative 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

44. The right to legal representation

610x 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

45. The right to bear arms

p2 ammo gun range 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

46. Fresh air

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courtesy of Viking

47. Beautiful night skies

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48. Sunlight

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courtesy of catolla (flickr)

49. Friends

tumblr lbsos85gEE1qeglkbo1 500 large 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

50. Family

family wideweb  430x3590 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

 

My hope is that after reading this, you will share it with more of your “poor” not rich friends and perhaps they too can embrace this reality. Leave a comment if you can think of more things rich people have that you don’t.

 

like 300x52 50 Ridiculous Luxuries Only Rich People Have

Maximillian Garland| Bright Futura Columnist

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interviews

In 2005, Young Zuckerberg had a narrow vision for Facebook.

“I mean, I just really want to see everyone focus on college and make a really cool college directory product,” he told the interviewer. “There doesn’t necessarily have to be more…Part of making a difference and doing something cool is focusing intensely.”

What do you think Facebook is?

“I think Facebook is an online directory for colleges…If I want to get information about you, I just go to TheFacebook, type in your name, and it hopefully pulls up all the information I’d care to know about you,” Zuckerberg said.

i think facebook is an online directory for collegesif i want to get information about you i just go to thefacebook type in your name and it hopefully pulls up all the information id care to know about you zuckerberg said Young Zuckerberg: What Was Facebook Suppose To Be?
Fun fact:The blue design of the site is partially because of Mark’s red-green color blindness.

Watching this video it appears Zuckerberg is no genius.

As he drinks his beer barefoot in an office atop a Chinese food restaurant covered in graffiti, you begin to think

quote1 Young Zuckerberg: What Was Facebook Suppose To Be?

He got into Harvard, not an easy task but also not impossible. He wasn’t the only high schooler to do so and he wont be the last. He lived in the dorms and attended lecture just like you and I.

What made Mark Zuckerberg different?

The video gives insight into a Zuckerberg many of us don’t normally get to see. It shows a bright young mind just trying to make a difference.

 

What really set Mark apart is that he actually tried. Something many of us would never even dare to do.

ideas Young Zuckerberg: What Was Facebook Suppose To Be?

We so often only see the end product that we forget that at some point it was just a simple prototype. And before it was that it was just a tiny little idea in someones head.

The Mona Lisa, The Taj Mahal, the Pyramids, equality for all race and creeds, and even Facebook were all just ideas in someone’s head. What’s in yours?

 

video from Businessinsider
Maximillian Garland | Bright Futura Columnist
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trip

humblebe2 Adobedays and Bright Futura: The Beginning of Something New

Screen Shot 2012 05 19 at 10.04.30 PM 1024x588 Adobedays and Bright Futura: The Beginning of Something New

Bright Futura is now an emerging college entity, not to be trifled with, but only a few months ago it was just an idea in Max Futura’s (Maximillian Garland) dorm room.

 

With little to no coding experience, Max Futura took his idea to tumblr where a least he’d be able to set the ground work for what you see today.

 

 As the audience for Bright Futura began to grow so did it’s need to adapt.

nothing Adobedays and Bright Futura: The Beginning of Something NewOver the last few months, the transition from tumblr to wordpress was anything but smooth. But obviously, nothing worthwhile comes easy. The blog is beginning to blossom and the content is slowly starting to take on a style of it’s own. But originality it wasn’t always a focus at Bright Futura, at least not in the beginning.

 

At the start, Bright Futura was the product of hours of tirelessly aggregating articles from many of the big name college blogs and news sources. The simple aggregate style model quickly became less appealing. It became really clear that Bright Futura needed original content to stand out.

It was also pretty obvious from the jump that Bright Futura could not be run by Max Futura alone. So bloggers were recruited to contribute original and fresh new ideas for both the direction of the site and content. By the 3rd month, Bright Futura had gone from being a one man brigade, to being a small tribe of motivated college masterminds.

reachingout Adobedays and Bright Futura: The Beginning of Something New

I wanted Bright Futura to help students share and showcase their experiences with one another. I wanted those with knowledge about success to be able to share it with those who were seeking it. I happened to be one of those people seeking. -Max Futura

How did you overcome a lot of the initial issues with starting a blog

Max Futura: I learned very early on that I couldn’t do this thing by myself. I began to study those in the college niche with hopes that I’d be able to learn from their mistakes. I contacted various people in the college blog world so that I could interview them and pick their brains.

Who did you reach out to?

Max Futura: I mostly just studied what the big names were doing. Blogs I wanted to resemble and blogs that I absolutely didn’t want to be like. I reached out to Thomas Frank of College Info Geek and he really showed me the ropes. After doing a post on him, we remained in contact via Skype and Facebook.

Related Article: Interview with Thomas Frank: Creator Of College Info Geek

I even added him to the Bright Futura team Facebook group, so that he could drop his 2 cents every so often. The people he has helped me meet, coupled with the tips and guidance he’s given me is invaluable.

That guy really knows his stuff. He’s the one who introduced me to the people at Slugbooks and Adobe.

adobedays1 Adobedays and Bright Futura: The Beginning of Something New

The great minds at Adobe are spending a lot of efforts on trying to understand how they can better server both their core design student users and those students who aren’t so design savvy.

In fact, Adobe just so happens to care so much about us students, that they flew bloggers like me,

out to one of their major offices in San Francisco for a conference known as Adobe days.

What I packed for the trip.

preq 1024x407 Adobedays and Bright Futura: The Beginning of Something New

During this three day supa dupa awesome conference, we college bloggers were submerged in opportunities to learn from both Adobe and each other.

We attended sessions on

  • T-shirt and image design: Photoshop and Illustrator
  • The future of video generation & vlogging: Premiere
  • Exclusive glimpses future adobe products
  • Product discussion groups
  • The new features of CS6 and Creative Cloud
  • Blogger content development

adobedaytalk Adobedays and Bright Futura: The Beginning of Something New

We also toured the amazing streets of San Fransisco, with a world-class guide and celebrity blogger Xavier Lanier (Notebooks.com & Gottabemobile)

Tour And Talk With Xavier Lanier In San Fransisco


goldengate11 1024x802 Adobedays and Bright Futura: The Beginning of Something New

If you want to do this (blog) professionally or even if you want to do this as a side job, I have friends who still have a real job

I have a friend… who makes more money and gets more enjoyment blogging about Mac computers than he does being a doctor. So, If you have that dream keep it alive…this is a really great way to be creative.

- Xavier Lanier (gottabemobile.com)

What’s Next & The Road Ahead

Trips to San Fran aren’t the motivation for building Bright Futura but they sure as hell are a perk

The learning I was able to do during these wildly memorable Adobedays, was almost better than the luxurious trip and accommodations (I said almost). This little trip is the first of many for our team. While, Bright Futura has in no way “made it”, the Bright Futura team can say that we are headed in the right direction. We hope you’ll stick with us on our journey forward and keep your dreams alive. As small as we are, we had even smaller beginnings, remember that.

The road ahead for Bright Futura will without a doubt be long and winding with bumps and turns but I’m positive that with a strong team of students always behind us You & I Will Never BE A LOAN.

.

 

tripphoto Adobedays and Bright Futura: The Beginning of Something New

Maximillian Garland| Bright Futura Columnist

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last10

Even the commander and chief was a freshman at one point. The leader and former leaders of our country did big things as presidents but there was a time when they were scrambling to make deadlines just like you.

It is hard to get a sense of their youth when you look at pictures of them now, so I have assembled old school snapshots of the last 10 presidents of the USA.

Pictures Of The Last 10 Presidents During Their College Years

Barack Obama

Young Barack Obama 2 238x300 What Did The Last 10 Presidents Look Like In College?   barak obama the freshman1 What Did The Last 10 Presidents Look Like In College?

In Office from: January 20, 2009 – Present

Obama was a transfer student.

Interesting Fact: Before young Obama went to Columbia University he attend Occidental College in LA.

 

George W. Bush

president bush1 What Did The Last 10 Presidents Look Like In College?

Years in office: January 17, 1995 – December 21, 2000

He characterized himself as an average student.

Interesting fact: During his time at Yale, he was a member of Delta Kappa Epsilon, being elected the fraternity’s president during his senior year. Bush also became a member of the Skull and Bones society as a senior. Continue Reading

quote1

There’s no doubt about it — classes, work, papers, projects, exams and everything else about college eventually tear you down. Days stuck in the library for hours, and in class can be boring and there are times when you loses your mojo. Times when choosing studying over Facebook and twitter is damn never impossible. As much as you want to skip studying and play Call of Duty instead, you’ve got to snap out of it and hit the books. If the pressure of crunch time isn’t keeping you focused or getting you excited about philosophy or molecular biology, then check out these seven great quotes to get you through the tough times.

1.“It’s not that I’m so smart, it’s just that I stay with problems longer.” ~ Albert Einstein

albert einstein 7 Kiss Ass Quotes That Will Get You Motivated

2. “Recipe for success: Study while others are sleeping; work while others are loafing; prepare while others are playing; and dream while others are wishing.” ~ William A. Ward

 

Related: 5 Ways to Get Work Done without Actually Working

Related:  How Not to Die In College: No Four Year Fears

 

3. “You may never know what results come of your action, but if you do nothing there will be no result.” ~ Mahatma Gandhi

 

4. “The only thing that I see that is distinctly different about me is I’m not afraid to die on a treadmill. I will not be out-worked, period. ~ Will Smith (Watch Full Quote Below)

“The only thing that I see that is distinctly different about me is I’m not afraid to die on a treadmill. I will not be out-worked, period. You might have more talent than me, you might be smarter than me, you might be sexier than me, you might be all of those things you got it on me in nine categories. But if we get on the treadmill together, there’s two things: You’re getting off first, or I’m going to die. It’s really that simple, right?
You’re not going to out-work me. It’s such a simple, basic concept. The guy who is willing to hustle the most is going to be the guy that just gets that loose ball. The majority of people who aren’t getting the places they want or aren’t achieving the things that they want in this business is strictly based on hustle. It’s strictly based on being out-worked; it’s strictly based on missing crucial opportunities. I say all the time if you stay ready, you ain’t gotta get ready.”


 

5.  “I’m not telling you it is going to be easy — I’m telling you it’s going to be worth it” ~ Art Williams

 

6. “If you love what you do, you will never work another day in your life.” ~ Confucius

 

7. “The best way to finish an unpleasant task is to get started.” ~ Anonymous

 

Exam Quotes: 15 Motivations To Pass Your Exam

 

Maximillian Garland | Bright Futura Columnist

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LoveLanguage

If you have ever taken a foreign language course, you are very familiar with the difficulties of translating. When something is translated into another language and translated back into the original language, the original meaning is lost.

Such is also the case when a book is made into a movie or a movie into a book. Due to the differences between the two mediums, details such as length and dialogue are lost.

In both forms, the original meaning cannot be perfectly translated word-for-word into the other language or medium. Of the countless ways we can show love to one another, everyone has a love language, and

We all identify primarily with one of the five love languages:

1. Words of Affirmation

2. Quality Time

3. Receiving Gifts

4. Acts of Service

5. Physical Touch

languages of love heart postcard p239649448241579333z8iat 400 5 Love Languages and How They Translate For You.

 

 

In honor of this Valentine’s Day, what better way to enhance your love life than by taking Dr. Chapman’s world-famous Love Language quiz?

Not only are you finding out more about yourself, but it is also a way to build lasting relationships with those around you — whether it be as a partner, a parent, a sibling or a friend. We all know communication is vital for a healthy relationship — but we overlook the languages communication can come in.

 

 

 

Related: 5 Signs He’s Just Not That Into You…

Related: The Other Third Wheel: Surviving Your BFF’s Significant Other

Love comes in many different forms and this is reflective of the many different languages love can be expressed in.

After being married one year, I’m not sure I’m “in love” anymore. Where could we have gone wrong?
This is the same question I was asking the first year of my marriage. I had been told that if you are really “in love” it will last forever. I was misinformed.

The fact is that the emotional obsession, which we commonly call “falling in love,” is a temporary experience.

The fact is that the emotional obsession, which we commonly call “falling in love,” is a temporary experience. The fact is that the emotional obsession, which we commonly call “falling in love,” is a temporary experience. Research indicates that the average life span of this “in love” phase is two years. Since we fall in love before we get married, most couples are coming down off the high within the first year of their marriage. We no longer feel those warm bubbly feelings, and we no longer think that our spouse is perfect. In fact we are realizing that we are so different, and we are wondering, “How did we ever get together?”

Almost never does a husband and wife have the same love language.

Then begins the second and more important phase of love: learning how to speak each other’s love language. My book The Five Love Languages has helped thousands of couples make this transition. The basic idea is that each of us has a primary love language. Almost never does a husband and wife have the same love language. In order to keep emotional love alive after we come down off the “in love” high, we must learn to speak each other’s language. The five love languages are words of affirmation, gifts, acts of service, quality time, and physical touch. Once you make this transition, you will each feel loved, and you will hardly even miss the “in love” high. Your emotional love tank will be filled by your spouse’s regular expressions of love. To discover your primary love language, see The Five Love Languages. (excerpt from Dr. Chapman’s website)

We all speak different love languages. Often, we define others by viewing them as ‘incompatible’ when in reality, it is just miscommunication. A successful relationship is the result of communicating to get to the point where you understand each other when the both of you speak the same love language. That way, it feels effortless to express yourself without relinquishing your love to communication lost in translation. It becomes easier to be able to satisfy your partner’s needs and not put in what satisfies your own needs into your partner because it may not be what they need from you.

Do you and your Sig Fig speak the same language?

 

Sabrina Ahmed | Bright Futura Columnist

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